Do Something Hard

Do you get the feeling that society at large has thrown in the towel?

People keep talking about the end of 2020 as though everything will magically be better when the clock strikes midnight on January 1.

I’ll admit the concept has spawned some good jokes, like the “wipe away 2020” roll of toilet paper I received for Christmas and the observation that soon hindsight really will be 2020.

All the same, I’m not buying it. 2021 has the potential to be just as bad – or as good – as any other year.

Some of this will be out of our control. But how we respond to whatever comes (to wax a bit Viktor Frankl) is up to each of us. The calendar isn’t going to make 2021 different. You are.

You’ve seen the meme about choosing your hard, right? The one that says divorce is hard, marriage is hard; getting fit is hard, being unfit is hard; etc. Choose your hard.

I love that. Sure, change is going to hurt. But staying the same is worse.

Consider: What makes you feel better when you’re feeling down?

There’s the old “me time” recommendation. And sure, a little self care in the form of a hot bath or takeout dinner is nice. But in my experience, it fails to offer lasting change. I wake up the next day feeling exactly the same (or, in the case of General Tso’s and egg rolls, worse). 

Real relief isn’t found in taking a break from reality, but in taking control of it.

What if, instead of trying to coddle away the frustration, loneliness, boredom, grief, and anger, we gave ourselves a project? Not a craft with the kids or an afternoon with cookie dough and icing, but a serious challenge. Something hard. 

Think about your life right now. What’s going on with your body? Your time? Your emotions? Your space? Your mind?

What bothers you about the way things are?

Most of us carry around some level of dissatisfaction. Often, the burden is so familiar that we forget it’s there.

That old resentment. That extra jiggle in your arms. That soda habit. That colt’s bucking tendency you’ve been working around instead of working through.

It’s like wearing sunglasses in a dim room. You’re always squinting, trying to see, but putting up with it because that’s “just the way it is.”

Well…what if you took the sunglasses off?

What if, instead of just resting from 2020, you took on 2021 with purpose? What if you stood up one more time and took control? Don’t just lay there all wrung out.

Do something hard.

26 thoughts on “Do Something Hard”

  1. Ok I’m in. This isnt my whole list but some of my top choices are 1. Lose 20 pounds. My horse will like that, haha. Probably should cut out the sweets habit that I started during the pandemic 2. Declutter my house. Too much stuff collected over the years especially since my mom passed and I kept a lot of her things. 3. Stop being hyopthangry. That post resonated for sure! 4. Read books instead of watching TV. I’ll probably think of more but that’s a start. Looking forward to some accountability.

    1. Woot woot! I love your decluttering idea! And do feel free to add more ideas later. I actually just edited the post to add a few more things that I thought of during my workout.

  2. I’m in also! Last year a friend pushed me to better my riding and my horsemanship. I have some PTSD from a mare that was extremely difficult to ride but I had her for ten years. It was like riding a lit box of dynamite. The gelding I have now is safe, sane, and sound. So, on the push of my friend, I have been doing arena work in addition to trail riding. Our goal was the AQHA world show but…..Covid. So this year’s theme is Let The Pony Run and working toward shoeing in ranch horse shows.

    Thanks for doing this. It’s easier if I have to be accountable.

    1. Hi Jenny! OMG, riding fear. I hear you on that one. See “challenging filly” above – ha. I’ll be interested in hearing about your progress!

  3. Me too! I don’t have horses (I just admire them from afar) but I found you through the iFit page. I just got a treadmill to get back to running after a couple kids and a lot of pounds gained. I’m just walking now but I want to run a 5k in 2021.

    1. Welcome, Aubrey! No horses necessary. 🙂 I have the treadmill too and am doing Tommy’s Iberian Beginner Running Series — on week 3 now. Slow and steady does the trick, eh?

  4. 1. Lose 20 more pounds
    2. Continue strength training
    3. Quit smoking (again)
    4. Ride the 100 mile AERC National Championship
    5. Finish Tevis

  5. Finish rebuilding my website & blog!
    Ride Spaarklestripe & Derby toward Dressage & distance competitively.
    Ride every day – eventhough I live in northern WI where it’s very cold & snowy
    Contnue fitness practices for strength, balance, flexiblity & dietary. and more I’m sure! I

    1. Awesome! I hope you’ll share your blog when it’s up and running. We need more good distance riding blogs in the world. 🙂 And you know the fitness stuff is close to my heart.

      Riding every day. In Wisconsin. You are my hero. I was thinking of something along the lines of just doing *something* with the horses every day (besides feeding them), but you have seriously raised the bar.

      1. I will share! Thanks! & I should add that by “every day” I mean weekdays -0 we got a snowblower, so Now I’m hopeful to actually be able to GET to the horses for more than tossing hay or graining – but I am excit3d to at least try & I am preparing by gathering the warm gear I know I’ll need! I have a schedule & a plan,.

  6. 1) 10k race (human running)
    2) Savage race
    3) Murph Challange

    1) I am registered for February 21, 2021. My only prior races have been 5k and I am *not* someone who loves to run. I am, however, someone who craves a challenge and mental wins so here we go. I was training before my last pregnancy and ended up sidelined for months with a nagging knee injury and PT… then pregnant then emergency cesarean. I digress but this goal is big for me.

    2) I am registered for April 10, 2021. I originally planned to do the abbreviated version but was talked into the full thing: 6-7 miles and 27 obstacles. I’ve never attempted an OCR before. My thought process is that, if I can complete the 10k race in Feb, I can maintain fitness and keep training through April. Husband doing it with me will help, I think. He did one this year.

    3) I regularly complete Murphs as part of my training. However, I’d like to clock in at close to 50 minutes and do as many pull ups without a band as possible for the “real” challenge on May 31, 2021.

    I have goals, I have dates. I have paid and registered. Now the real challenge: staying injury free long enough to complete them all! One day, I’ll have a horse or access again and be able to add distance riding goals to my list. I have been horseless for 4 years now… but who’s counting?

    Tally ho!

    1. Rebecca! So cool! I hear you on the pushing toward goals while trying to remain injury-free. I think I have finally learned that backing off on one workout if I start feeling tweaky is better than pushing through and costing myself 2 weeks of recovery. *eyeroll* It only took 20 years to figure that out. LOL

      Super exciting about your OCR! I want to do my first this year, also, COVID permitting.

      You aren’t located in SW Idaho, are you? I could use a horseless rider.

  7. Hello,
    I enjoy reading your blog very much and have been thinking about joining your 2021 Challenge for a few days. Even though I like the idea and understand the importance of having goals, the phrase “Do something hard” made me pause. My life has been filled with personal challenges for the past 2 1/2 years. In addition, all of us had to learn to cope with unexpected events like COVID. Our life’s have changed in ways nobody could have imagined. So here are my goals for 2021:
    1. I don’t want to do “hard” any more.
    2. I want to slow down. Words like mindfulness, compassion, inner peace,
    healthy lifestyle have found their way into my life and I am learning to
    incorporate them into my daily routines.
    3. I want to simplify, less is more.
    4. Reduce stress as much as possible.
    5. Set boundaries (say “no” without feeling guilty) & be true to myself.
    There are more things, but these are my starting points. Writing them down made me think that putting them into a “action plan” and trying to live by them is hard, too. But what is easy these days? The world we live in has so many uncertainties, everything changes in such a fast pace it is scary. Who can keep up any more?
    I forgot one important point. More than anything else, I want to spend more time with my horses again and ride.
    Thank you!

    1. Simone, I LOVE this. As I read, I found myself reaching the same conclusion that you did: the challenge you’re proposing for yourself is a different kind of hard, and sometimes it’s the most important thing we can do. It especially resonates with me because that was my 2020. I had to learn to slow down, let go of always being the best and striving, and just be. It took me over a year to get it (somewhat) figured out, as you know, and I’m still very conscious of it. I’m right here with you. <3 As for more time with the horses…me too.

  8. 2021 Goals:

    Defeat my snacking habit(again). I let it creep back in with the tremendous stress COVID added to my job.

    Push myself in my workouts. I can do heavier weight. Get out of the comfort zone a bit!

    At least 1 LD with my mare! She challenges me is so many ways. We completed 100 miles together in a virtual challenge. Riding alone makes me nervous and is a bit of an obstacle for me, but we are taking steps at home to rife out alone.

    Trail run with my ponies at home. All the fitness for horse and human!

    1. Welcome, Katie! I hear you on the heavier weight. Me too. LOL.

      Also, on the nervousness. I don’t mind riding out alone per say, but I had a bad wreck a few years ago and am still working through the fear when things get dicey. Sometimes I get off and walk/run with the horse for a while, so maybe it all works out! 🙂

      1. Same! I also had a bad wreck a few years ago that tanked my confidence. That’s when the fear came on. I swore I would never ride that horse again. But, I did. And completed an LD on him!
        My mare is tough. Smart, sassy, well trained, opinionated, low tolerance for BS, and a bit herd bound. I love her though! But, that’s where things get dicey for us. Riding out alone can meam melt downs. Then my confidence gets rattled, and it can get nerve wracking. We are getting better though! I have ridden her solo at home 3 times on my property (short rides) successfully. Baby steps, but a bit further each time.

  9. 1. Walk/run with my horse 40 km in January (groundwork, not riding)
    2. Figure out how to accomplish #1 while still riding 2-3 days per week, working, and keeping my life in balance (this is the hard part!!)
    3. Train Ralph to load on my trailer. He’s terrified of it.
    4. Participate in at least one OCTRA ride, virtual if needed. (Depends on #3, but no excuses)
    5. Finish de-cluttering my house! This could be the hardest one to achieve.
    6. My next MRI is in March. Keep prioritizing health before all so that I have a better result than the 2020 scan.

    Your challenge is so well timed, I have been thinking all week about what I want to achieve in 2021 and how on earth am I going to make it all happen? Haven’t even included relationship, family, financial goals in the above list … it’s all swirling about in my head, but the act of writing it down has already been helpful for clarity. Next step, prioritize into what I can realistically achieve, and set measurable steps to take. Thank you!!!!

    1. OMG, Mr. Sweaty and I had exactly that same conversation this morning. Sooooo many things to accomplish, and a limited amount of time. Hopefully we can all help keep each other on track as we take on whatever is reasonable at any given time.

      As I said over on FB, I super love your walk/run with horse mileage challenge. And a training issue…yep! I’ll be doing some of that also. Not loading in my case, but balking under saddle. We can do this.

  10. I’m late to the party but I’m here.
    1. Ride consistently.
    2. Complete the NRC Plus equine nutrition course.
    3. Rehab my hamstring then focus on strength training.

  11. I just stumbled upon this, ironically due to my “hard thing” goal: try a 3-day LD AERC ride. I know my horse can do 2 days, as we’ve been doing essentially that for the last 4ish years with NATRC (competitive trail), but I’ve never tried doing 3 days. The Top of the World ride is my choice as it’s 2 hours from where I will live at the time. I was poking around and found your blog that way.

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